hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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