Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Randomize
