I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
