sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
