its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
