it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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