Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
She told me I should be a condom model.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
