My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You're like the curious george of whores
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Randomize
