Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize