Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Randomize
