My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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