I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
