my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
You left your underwear on the fireplace
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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