I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize