So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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