I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i just had sex bonerless
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
