I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Randomize
