I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
