Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
