So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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