porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
