jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize
