His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
