? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Why is there bacon in the couch?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
