I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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