his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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