so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
