yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
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