A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
