I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
