omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
