Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
