Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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