The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
