seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
