There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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