wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
