You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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