You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
