i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
