I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
