Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
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