Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
