where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Boobs speak an international language.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
