This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Holy shit dude........stairs
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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