You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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