don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize