just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
