Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
please come you make the beer taste better
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
