hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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