this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Randomize
